


Spell it out for me

by cairowren



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-08
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2019-04-20 09:26:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14257953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cairowren/pseuds/cairowren





	Spell it out for me

_You know he had a crush on you back in the day._

             …What?

 

             Armitage looked at Phasma, bewildered at what just came straight out of her mouth. Phasma laughed in response at her long time friend now coworker’s jaw that hung down to the floor.

 

             “Seriously. Did you not notice?”

 

             They were both sitting at small café on a Friday night when familiar set of ears and head of hair walked in and immediately stepped into line. The man appeared to be within his own bubble, occupied with playing games on his phone and with ear buds in his ears.

 

             When Armitage gazed upon the figure he immediately jolted in recognition.

 

             Ben Solo.

 

             He was an old classmate of theirs who is supposedly rumored to go by Kylo Ren now.

 

 _But that’s a downright lie._ Armitage knows he goes by Kylo Ren now because he’s been following his art career ever since they three of them graduated highschool. They were bestfriends back in the day but he and Kylo haven’t exactly parted in the best of ways after graduation and haven’t been in contact since. Back then, Armitage was too prideful to apologize and when he finally worked up the courage to, summer was almost over and Armitage found out Kylo ~~Ben~~ already took an early flight to another state to attend an art school.

 

             Now here they were 5 years later in the same café….

 

              “Oh my god. Isn’t that Ben? We should call him over! B-“ Armitage busted out of his seat to prevent her from continuing any further. He felt his cheeks warm when he noticed other people within the café took notice of their little episode. Luckily, Kylo was too occupied with his game to realize what just transpired.

 

              “Seriously what’s with you? You haven’t seen him in years. Don’t you want to talk to him?”

 

             “No just-just let him be”

 

              “Wait, is this about that fight you guys supposedly had all those years ago? Is it still a thing?”

 

              Armitage stared at the steep rising from his tea  unwilling to answer the question.

 

              “Armie, seriously?”

 

              A long pause occurred between them.

 

 _“_ You know he had a crush on you back in the day _”_

             “Wait what?”

 

             Phasma laughed. “Seriously. Did you not notice? I thought you knew. I suspected it was why you guys fought in the first place.”

 

_Well in those days we fought. We always fought about stupid things. Taste in music, taste in tv shows. Why this particular play sucks. And if he made fun of me I retaliated back. It never escalated to anything too dire though. He was always there for me when it came to the other peers teasing me. Ben was already an intimidating figure by sophomore year so he was always there to ward off any bullying. He was always there…But isn’t that what friendship was?_

 

            “Phas, you know me. I’m particularly clueless when it comes to these things. You have to spell it out to me or else I will just not get it,” Armitage huffed with a little embarrassment. Was it so obvious?

 

            “Plus we were in highschool. It wasn’t…exactly my priority,” he said while stirring his already cold tea.

 

            “So what are you going to do about it?”

 

            “hm?” He just wanted to avoid this topic all together.

 

            “Armie”

 

            “Phas it’s been years. Even if I had known his feelings back then it wouldn’t have changed anything. He would have left to another state anyway.”

 

            Phasma gave him a long stare.

 

            “You didn’t want him to leave didn’t you? That’s why you fought?”

           

             “Phas-“

 

            “Armie tell me truth because it sounds like you’ve been denying how much him leaving hurt you.”

 

He didn’t want to admit it but when it came to college and university applications, he felt like he was the one out of Ben and himself that felt like things were changing too quickly. Ben was surprising set on everything. He seemed ready to leave the city they grew up together in and experience something else altogether. Early in their senior year, Ben was already pretty set on going to art school in another state whereas Armitage was indecisive of what University to go to because he had to weigh what he wanted versus where his father expected him to go.

 

            Sometimes when he and Ben were hanging out together, Ben usually brought up the idea of finally leaving his father and mother’s house and having a place of his own in another state away from them. _~~Away from him~~. _ Everytime their conversations strayed toward life after high school, Armitage always felt a huge amount of anxiety.

 

            _Was I nervous to leave high school or was it Ben leaving that really bothered me?_

 

            _But it doesn’t matter now does it. It’s been 5 years and we’re practically strangers. If something was there what difference would it make now?_

            “You should talk to him. He’s sitting in the corner now. He looks like he’s in the mood where if you interrupt him he won’t get TOO mad,” she chuckled a bit.

 

Armitage weighed his options then downed his cold tea as if it was a shot. He got up without a word and headed slowly towards where ~~Ben~~ Kylo was sitting.

 

            _This could be the worse or best decision of my life._ _I want to think fate is absolute bull but for some reason I feel like if I let you leave without a word like that day 5 years ago it will be biggest mistake of my life._

_I just know I missed you…I hope you missed me too._


End file.
